" Rape is sensational than Empowerment "

Rape > Woman Empowerment

Half of you would have already closed the tab assuming another such article. A few among the rest are eager to counter argument to what I will be writing and hence are forcefully reading. Sorry, my target is not you. Infact my target is no one. It’s the paradox we live in. The multi-fold deviance we exhibit.

We have become so passive and immune to this word “Woman Empowerment” that we have stopped responding to it. Being the largest minority in our country, contemporary woman is striving her best to prove herself, breaking barriers at home and hence the high society. Ambitious? Arrogant? Non-Conformist? Yes, so is she paying fruits for it.

It was non-acceptance of equal credit in the inception. That became obsolete as women have proven to be better than many men in their fields. Then emerged the ubiquitous weapon. Call it abuse, harassment or Molestation. The act might change, not the idea behind it. It’s not a physical aberration my friends, but demeaning her respect and poisoning her growth.

Like any other typical Indian woman, even I have been patiently reading news articles, following debates about provocation, participated in candle marches, sporting a black dot as profile picture. Been there, empathised that and the time has also tested enough. An MP who tortures a maid, a senior judge harassing an intern and now, a journalist subordinate in the clutches of THE editor-in-chief. The way society responds is even funnier. Khap’s taking away mobile phones, advice that rapists are to be called as brothers, proposal of removing women in risky jobs totality to avoid misbehaviour. Mind you, there is always this middle class family which compels to be silent and get away with it. The problem is not the people, per se. But the value system we abide. Sui generis? Unfortunately no longer.

Enough of those provocation talks okay. How does a 5-year old tempt you? We all clap when our sister wins a competition. We buy gifts to our wives if she gets a pay hike. But all the rest of the women are welcome to objectification. Offer: Age no constrain. They don’t have a heart; they titillate your sensual reflexes. The way pornography, Oh dear, I don’t have to go that far; our Bollywood movies themselves will vindicate how a woman is treated.

All I want to ask is to define masculinity. What is it like to be a Man? Mard, voh hai kya cheez ? As we have enough norms how to define an ideal woman, so let’s understand what the dialectical other pole. Is he the strength personified or to be tolerant and amiable to respect her uprising.  There are enough laws, implement them with true spirit. Create space for her, or at least don’t encroach into her privacy unless she asks for it. She is mature, don’t pamper her. Let that Cinderella mould of external dependency and support break. Nurturing woman like a plant is what this whole talk is about. Invest a little hope and faith and see! She gives you fruits tastier than ever.

This doesn’t end here, but also to treat the survivors with dignity. Media and civil society should probably maintain her self esteem by maintaining the anonymity. Stop attaching social stigma to her for she is not the offender. The job is not just her livelihood. It’s her heart's answer to all those blows society pokes on her chest.

Let her race thrive, uncurtailed. She deserves at least that, being our half.

Having said that, I want to rephrase, my contribution won’t end here writing a piece of agony. I hereby promise that I will strive to take a solid action.               

For that, time will only answer. But, One line.

"To be charitable is a virtue, To be empowered is a human right "

P.S  With a few excerpts from my delegate talk a month ago, in a National Youth Convention. Irony is that was in harmony with Tehelka’s Managing Editor Miss Shoma Choudary’s speech!

Really ? 

Life as it comes, but !

It’s a dark winter night in the capital city. Street lights are brighter than ever before and the road seems ‘safer’. My little stroll on it makes no difference to the people running in pursuit of their weekend goals. That’s the best part, when nobody is counting upon you (not always though) your brain goes wild, you dive deep in the ocean of innovation and end up finding new traces of ‘you’ that are unexplored so long. 

Mobile rings but it is not audible in the hustle bustle of mind ramblings. I feel technology should restrict its coercion when we need some space for ourselves. Whatever.  

Eyes met with a stranger, who is trying to extract some sense happening around. Smiles. Exchanged. Confusion. Regained. Man! Nobody is clear of what one is doing with their lives. We all started running behind goals of uncertain destination or rather should I call uncertain process.

Then, have been to a book store, to add up a soul to the already existing space-crisis of my bookshelf. You see, I love books. But I can’t marry a one. And then mind jumped to think how the sequence of life with a soul mate is gonna be. And then, came back from that paranoia to be realistic that I won’t be marrying in the near future. Mind said cut the crap. I did.

We all work at the clemency of our thought process, ever cared to tune it in the way we wanted to? Let that mind be free from dogma and despair, as envisaged by Tagore. But let that be reflecting you in all ways because,

Mind as a game is a one-man show....

Came home and squatted on the terrace for a star counting exercise. It is those little things you relish and, alas !

Life as it comes...... 

 but make it as you choose it to be ! 

Who said you can't be your own destiny maker :) 

His Royal Highness....

I have always had this mania for tigers. The great Panthera Tigris. I can still recollect - I cried at an unbearable pitch when my parents were taking me away from the tiger cage, at a local zoo. Umpteen Animal planet and NG videos showcasing the majesty still cross my memories, added to many photographs in my hard disk. Be it his royal way of strolling amidst the wild jungles, the black stripy bright yellow flexible body or just the sharp eyes, I have always loved them. If only I had a permit from PETA, his royal highness would have already been my husband. Such is my love.

This rose to an all-new level seeing a 2004 release, Two Brothers. One of the most amazing animal adventure fables ever captured on silver screen. A tale of two tiger cubs – Kumal and Sangha. The director, Jean-Jacques Annaud is cool enough to take us deep into the soul of the plot rolling on. We must have thought only about human survival when attacked by savage animals. At least that is what our evolution says, taming and taking control over them. However, have you ever empathized how hard it would be for the same animal facing hurdles literally every moment?

Plot is simple, two cubs and a mother, departed by human selfish means, surviving through tough phases and converging at last. But the flick made me think of many dimensions, which are not so often taken in. The typical nature of human dominance over nature, mother tiger’s agony when departed from cubs, their resistance against cruel circus taming and the difficulties they experience when brought far away from  nature’s lap. So natural, so convincing even for people like us, who already lost the sparkle touch of nature.

This slowly drifted me to the current scenario of tigers. 10,000 were alive a century back, leaving less than 4,000 now.  Both of us, the wild cats and we, the social animals struggle alike for survival. Yet, so much discrimination - Deprived of their basic rights. So uncivilized. 

How could the world's favorite animal be a poacher’s barbaric target? I leave it to the morals of our tech-savvy yet ethics-deprived world.

A Starlet’s Hope !

        

If I am flying like a bird,

I will glide over the skies, letting my feet touch the rainbow.

If I am urged to write a letter,

It can probably be in a book that millions read someday.

If I am dying to love you,

I laugh at your childish attempts trying to scale my unreadable depths.

Call it the Destiny or The God, who gave me this adorable present.

My  life.

I want to live to the fullest and to pamper it, with delight and concern.

This might be absurd for many, well, it is supposed to be.

Calling me crazy may titillate you, I am glad in that case too.

But watch your step, honey darling !

For I am gonna be the voice of tomorrow.

With that unflinching spirit you aspire to possess.

And with that inner beauty you would die to preserve.

This is my life, sweet like a melody. I hope you find it too.

That melody you are destined to. Maybe after a year. Or more.

But, it would be perfect, like this starry night, if you can trace it Now.

-    Dedicated to a lady, whose name is synonymous to Life. Sarah Kay !

Is Geeky the new trendy ?

(Citation: Here you = that clod of society which plays pranks at us, not you literally / figuratively. If you like geeks too or if you are a one, welcome aboard and join the club! )

With pride, I put my shoulders aloft and boast – “I am a geek, and I love being a one”. Yes, we are the new swanky. With bits and bytes of inputs from the surroundings and life’s interesting lessons, you should have already grasped this. If you know the most expecting and yet the inevitable pattern of life, witnessing trend cycles, this wouldn’t come as a surprise. Way back, it was the day of monarchs’ and dictators’. Yesterday, it’s that of the trendy and funky fellas’. But today, it is UNDOUBTEDLY ours!

Well, why are we so irresistible?

Here are the answers for those subtle questions lingering in some corner of your head. You thought we are the ones who have zero interest in worldly affairs. But we have mastery over anything we take up - mere scaling greater depths, beyond the expectations and scope. Aaron Swartz must have been tagged an oddball all his life, but after his technical break through, editorials were written lauding him all the way. Must be the same case with Bill gates or Steve jobs too. We believe in the ultimate excellence rather than impressing you, the high society.

You presumed that we are bad at maintaining relations. But, let me take you down with stats. Majority of the people in relationships wanted a person who would take care of them, not the unwanted ‘activity’ in social networking sites. That’s where we beat you dimension-less. We are caring and bear the bags of commitment if we love something.We are better lovers and the best trustables. We allot time, not pre-defined schedules. As we remember things better than anyone else, we pick out the best stuff out. Be it advice, gifts or solutions. Did we already surpass you? Take no offence, we are agile!

You also pre-defined our mindsets as not socially accepted. But we are a lot practical and know the in’s and out’s of a proposal. We may not tattoo our bodies with sport stars’ names, but we know how technically the match was played. Even our match is lost; we wait in sanity instead of pouring out illogical excitements. In short, we are a lot better than what you expect us to be. Mature and coherent. Better deal with it.

Now, this is deep within:

Fashion trends have a tendency to repeat themselves. One minute you are appreciated for your glossy dress and the next you can be totally out of date. I say it is good to stick to basics- you're never out of the loop, for basics are never boring.

Trying to be nerdy and portray that attitude is not always successfully carried out by everyone, nor is it an easy task for anyone. It is an art and art can express one’s self in a myriad of ways such as: emotionally, mentally, culturally, religiously, and in ways that help us to understand things in deeper meaning. However, this is not to say that you must entirely revamp your life style. It is okay folks; don’t worry now. Simply do whatever you feel you are most comfortable doing and if you eventually do plan to look trendier, add a blob of the unbeatable *geek soup*. Because having a geek’s mindset is an essential survival skill and bedrock for many in today’s world. Accept it, even though it is tough to take in.

Suggestion, if you want to take: Remember that pimply, spectacles studded old- fashioned lad/lass in your school/college, who was made fun of/ bullied by everyone? Better be nice to them, at least from now on. Chances are that he/she might end up being the headlines of the newspaper or the bearer of a 1st class magazine’s guest column. Even worse, you might work for him.

Hero of the day !

Ever felt a thank you - hand shake filling tonnes of satisfaction and inspiration? Experienced it today as I scribed English exam for a boy who is blind by fate, but impregnable and strong by choice. When I got a chance to write his exam, neither he nor did I expect it would turn out to be such a great day in our lives.

“Hi akka, here you are. I never had a scribe who came this early to write my exam”, greeted the smiling Varun kumar, today’s lead role.

“Shall we begin?”; I pushed, worrying if we could complete the exam on time or not. 

Took a minute to breathe and he started reading the question paper through my eyes. The question paper was of 12-pages. long. It all began with the Stalin’s and Leo Tolstoy’s contrast versions from the book - Animal farm (George Orwell). Having read that novel, I really knew how good and analytical his answers were. I was reading the comprehension- he listened to all those lengthy para’s just for once, answered all with astute accuracy. As I was writing, we slowly moved to our life lines. 

Showing me a recorder + player, he told that is the only source of his exam preparation - also shared by 4 of his friends. How he lost his eyes might be an normal accident, but the way he transformed and took life serious is not ordinary. Its beyond our senses, I have seen it. Born to a son of an electrician, the way he challenged life is a face slap to many of us. Fate beat him in the most sensitive issues, but he kept the fight going. Never gave up. 92 % current aggregate. 95% + is his target. Is there anything that could stop him?

Economics was his heart throb, he said as he blushes. I blushed when he said I was the best scribe he ever got, as I dint want to tell any answers. He understood that mere helping in such domains is not an aid, but a slow paced betrayal. Guess what, we are done with the exam before an hour. Reason – keenness at peaks, he feels bad about the crises not the disability. He strongly cares about reforms that are to be done in those areas.

I told him a few inspirational anecdotes and stories that moved me. They just add fuel to the fire of his Will - that will take him to the peaks. Of perfection and exaltation. When I asked how good his friends study? the answer came, “Talent and hard work can be compared, but sincerity and determination? How? The only thing that worries us is that our hard work is scaled up by scribes, who are often not so serious. They are good, charity stuff they feel. They need to empathize with our feelings. I always wonder how and why these mere numbers decide our destiny” 

With a great degree of happiness, I submitted the answer sheet, vicariously. We departed with a bond of I scribing for his final exams. I don't know if he will beat 95 this time. But LIFE. No compromise. 

He will just do it.