" Rape is sensational than Empowerment "

Rape > Woman Empowerment

Half of you would have already closed the tab assuming another such article. A few among the rest are eager to counter argument to what I will be writing and hence are forcefully reading. Sorry, my target is not you. Infact my target is no one. It’s the paradox we live in. The multi-fold deviance we exhibit.

We have become so passive and immune to this word “Woman Empowerment” that we have stopped responding to it. Being the largest minority in our country, contemporary woman is striving her best to prove herself, breaking barriers at home and hence the high society. Ambitious? Arrogant? Non-Conformist? Yes, so is she paying fruits for it.

It was non-acceptance of equal credit in the inception. That became obsolete as women have proven to be better than many men in their fields. Then emerged the ubiquitous weapon. Call it abuse, harassment or Molestation. The act might change, not the idea behind it. It’s not a physical aberration my friends, but demeaning her respect and poisoning her growth.

Like any other typical Indian woman, even I have been patiently reading news articles, following debates about provocation, participated in candle marches, sporting a black dot as profile picture. Been there, empathised that and the time has also tested enough. An MP who tortures a maid, a senior judge harassing an intern and now, a journalist subordinate in the clutches of THE editor-in-chief. The way society responds is even funnier. Khap’s taking away mobile phones, advice that rapists are to be called as brothers, proposal of removing women in risky jobs totality to avoid misbehaviour. Mind you, there is always this middle class family which compels to be silent and get away with it. The problem is not the people, per se. But the value system we abide. Sui generis? Unfortunately no longer.

Enough of those provocation talks okay. How does a 5-year old tempt you? We all clap when our sister wins a competition. We buy gifts to our wives if she gets a pay hike. But all the rest of the women are welcome to objectification. Offer: Age no constrain. They don’t have a heart; they titillate your sensual reflexes. The way pornography, Oh dear, I don’t have to go that far; our Bollywood movies themselves will vindicate how a woman is treated.

All I want to ask is to define masculinity. What is it like to be a Man? Mard, voh hai kya cheez ? As we have enough norms how to define an ideal woman, so let’s understand what the dialectical other pole. Is he the strength personified or to be tolerant and amiable to respect her uprising.  There are enough laws, implement them with true spirit. Create space for her, or at least don’t encroach into her privacy unless she asks for it. She is mature, don’t pamper her. Let that Cinderella mould of external dependency and support break. Nurturing woman like a plant is what this whole talk is about. Invest a little hope and faith and see! She gives you fruits tastier than ever.

This doesn’t end here, but also to treat the survivors with dignity. Media and civil society should probably maintain her self esteem by maintaining the anonymity. Stop attaching social stigma to her for she is not the offender. The job is not just her livelihood. It’s her heart's answer to all those blows society pokes on her chest.

Let her race thrive, uncurtailed. She deserves at least that, being our half.

Having said that, I want to rephrase, my contribution won’t end here writing a piece of agony. I hereby promise that I will strive to take a solid action.               

For that, time will only answer. But, One line.

"To be charitable is a virtue, To be empowered is a human right "

P.S  With a few excerpts from my delegate talk a month ago, in a National Youth Convention. Irony is that was in harmony with Tehelka’s Managing Editor Miss Shoma Choudary’s speech!

Really ? 

If only things can be changed for HER ...

If there is anything that irritated me and distorted my brain to the core today, that would be the headlines of the local newspaper. Not much into the details, it’s another report of sexual harassment of another woman - added to the innumerable cases that are already filed and the infinite ones that aren’t even in to the limelight. This is neither going be feminism supportive nor the ultra-modern girl’s association’s version. This is going to be the eye shot of mine. Typical, not-so-influential, but true from heart.

Well, I really don’t know whom to point out and address this blog. Because there is a man of every age group, of every sphere, at some point or the other, molesting a woman. Why? That too in a country where we are expected to respect ladies, (forget about worshipping, that’s the ideal case, because SHE is the incarnation of “Power”) Vedas have echoed the same –

कुपुत्रो जायेत क्वचिदपप कुमाता न भवतत ।

                                      - There can only be a bad son, never a bad mother.

But what to do, we are a nation of forgetters.

Ask any man, the reply would be, if not exactly, something like this – “why should girls be wandering in the city at nights? What’s so special about this party culture and they mingling intimidate with the guys of opposite sex? Why? Can’t they come back home straight away, as soon as their task is done?”

Ask any woman- if educated, she would say – “Aren’t woman human beings? Why should they be deprived of their freedom? They are free to do things that they like, not the ones people impose on them. Would you expect a guy behaving as per a girl’s impositions? Then why should it be the other way round?”

If she isn’t educated, she would say with a sigh – “This is what we are destined to, may be. We are dependent on man- be it husband or son. We can’t oppose the system; it would be useless, for our voices are never heard. Let’s somehow get away with this unhappy and never ceasing painful life”

Portrayal of woman as a gender-puppet isn’t the trend that has been created in the near past. It was long way back. With deprival of her basic rights on everything - her education, financial free hand, role in decision making or simply, her very lifestyle, what else is she subjected to? Except for eventually becoming a tool through which chauvinistic man can clear his drives.

To change this, let them be educated. Not in the schools as they propose. In life; in the situations of the present society. That’s a way out in which the dangers can be subsided somewhat under the silent administering of knowledge and courage in the place of ignorance and helplessness in their heads and hands. Let them have their own mark on everything. This doesn’t imply typical reservations, but some space for them to prove themselves, better. Let her defend herself, physicallly and psychologically. Let them be free as every bird is. Let her wings take her to a new plane of maturity and excellence. Women don’t expect someone to help them to do all the above. But silently prays that no one would restrain them from doing so. Result - a Sudha Murthy. A Sunitha Krishnan. A Kiran bedi. A free Indian woman.

We all owe woman her life. Such a beautiful and wonderful creation she is.

Let’s follow tolerance, we’ll go far. And the world will be new again with colours, this time, happier and livelier.